Many people living with dementia often talk about going “home” because this expression reflects deep emotional needs rather than a literal desire to return to a physical place. When someone with dementia says they want to go home, they are frequently communicating feelings of safety, comfort, belonging, and familiarity that they may no longer feel in their current environment. This longing for “home” is a way to express a yearning for emotional security and connection, especially as memory and orientation become impaired.
Dementia affects the brain’s ability to process recent memories and spatial awareness, which means people may forget where they are or why they are there. This confusion can cause distress and anxiety, leading them to seek a place that feels safe and known. “Home” often symbolizes a time or place where they felt loved, protected, and understood—sometimes this is their childhood home, their family home, or even a symbolic place tied to strong emotional memories. The word “home” can also represent a desire to be reunited with loved ones, such as parents or a spouse, or to return to a simpler, more secure time in their life.
Because dementia impairs memory and cognitive function, people may not recognize their current surroundings or caregivers, which can increase feelings of fear and disorientation. Saying they want to go home is a way to express this distress. It is important to understand that correcting or arguing with them about their reality often increases frustration and hopelessness. Instead, responding with empathy, kindness, and validation of their feelings helps meet the emotional need behind the words. For example, if a person says they want to go home, caregivers can respond by acknowledging their feelings (“You must be missing your home a lot”) and offering comfort rather than insisting on factual accuracy.
The desire to go home can also be linked to the phenomenon of wandering, common in dementia. Wandering is often a response to anxiety, confusion, or an attempt to escape an uncomfortable or unfamiliar environment. The person may be trying to find their way back to a place they recognize or feel safe in. This behavior is not purposeful in the usual sense but is driven by the brain’s impaired ability to orient itself in space and time.
Creating a supportive environment that feels familiar and safe can help reduce the distress that leads to these expressions. This includes maintaining consistent routines, using familiar objects, soft lighting, calming colors, and quiet spaces. Gentle music or items that hold personal meaning can also provide comfort. Communication strategies that use simple, clear language and a calm tone help reduce confusion and agitation.
Ultimately, when a person with dementia talks about going home, they are expressing a profound emotional need for comfort, security, and connection. Understanding this helps caregivers respond with compassion and patience, providing reassurance and a sense of belonging even when memory and reality are fragmented. This approach honors the person’s experience and supports their emotional well-being in the face of cognitive decline.
