When dementia patients ask to “go home” even though they are already at home, it reflects a complex mix of emotional, cognitive, and neurological factors rather than a literal desire to leave their current location. This behavior is common and can be deeply confusing and distressing for caregivers and family members, but understanding why it happens can help provide better support and comfort.
Dementia affects the brain’s ability to process information, remember recent events, and orient to time and place. As a result, a person with dementia may feel disoriented or confused about where they are, even if they are physically in their own home. Their sense of “home” may be tied more to a feeling of safety, familiarity, or a past memory rather than the actual present environment. When they say they want to “go home,” they might be expressing a longing for comfort, security, or a time when they felt more in control and less confused.
This request can also be a form of distress or anxiety. Dementia often causes emotional turmoil because the person struggles to understand their surroundings or what is happening to them internally. Asking to go home can be a way of communicating fear, loneliness, or a need for reassurance. It may also be a repetitive behavior that helps them self-soothe when they feel overwhelmed by overstimulation, fatigue, or unmet needs. For example, during times of sundowning—when confusion and agitation increase in the late afternoon or evening—such requests become more frequent as the brain tires and struggles to cope.
The phrase “I want to go home” can also be linked to memory loss. The person might be recalling an earlier home from their past, such as their childhood home or a place where they felt happiest, rather than their current residence. This can cause them to feel lost or unsettled because their internal map of “home” no longer matches reality. They might be trying to return to a place that exists only in their memory, which can never be physically reached.
Additionally, dementia can impair communication skills, making it difficult for patients to express their needs or feelings clearly. Saying “go home” might be a simple way to express a more complex emotional state like wanting to be with a loved one, feeling safe, or escaping discomfort. Since they may not be able to articulate these feelings directly, the phrase becomes a catch-all expression of distress.
Caregivers can respond to these requests with empathy and patience rather than correction or frustration. Trying to convince someone with dementia that they are already home often increases their confusion and anxiety. Instead, caregivers can offer reassurance, comfort, and distraction by engaging the person in familiar activities, using soothing tones, or gently redirecting their attention. Creating a calm environment with familiar objects, scents, or music can also help ground the person and reduce the urge to “go home.”
Sometimes, the behavior is linked to physical needs or discomfort that the person cannot express clearly. They might be hungry, tired, in pain, or needing the bathroom, and the phrase “go home” is their way of signaling that something is wrong. Observing other signs and addressing these needs can reduce repetitive questioning.
In some cases, the desire to “go home” may be connected to a feeling of wanting to escape a stressful or unfamiliar situation. Even if they are physically at home, changes in routine, new caregivers, or environmental changes can trigger feelings of insecurity. Maintaining consistent routines and familiar surroundings helps reduce these triggers.
Overall, when dementia patients ask to “go home,” it is less about a physical location and more about an emotional and cognitive need for safety, familiarity, and reassurance. Understanding this helps caregivers respond with compassion and patience, improving the quality of care and emotional well-being for those living with dementia.
