When a loved one with dementia tries to put their shoes on their hands, it can be confusing and upsetting for family members. This behavior is actually quite common in people with dementia and has several possible explanations.
As dementia progresses, it affects the brain’s ability to process visual information and recognize objects correctly. Your mother may no longer be able to tell the difference between shoes and gloves, or understand which body parts they go on. The brain damage from dementia can jumble up these associations.
Another factor is that dementia often impairs sequencing skills – the ability to put steps in the right order. Your mother may know she needs to put something on her hands, but can’t recall the correct item or process. Shoes are familiar objects, so she reaches for them instead.
Some people with dementia also experience issues with depth perception and spatial awareness. This can make it hard to judge the size and shape of objects in relation to body parts. To your mother, the shoes may seem like they could fit her hands.
Additionally, dementia frequently causes problems with fine motor skills. Manipulating small objects like buttons or shoelaces becomes very difficult. Larger items like shoes may feel easier for your mother to handle.
It’s also possible that your mother is acting out a familiar routine, like getting dressed, but can’t fully remember or execute the steps properly. The shoes are part of getting dressed, so she’s using them, just not correctly.
While this behavior can be frustrating, it’s important to respond with patience and understanding. Gently redirect your mother to the correct items. You might try laying out her clothes in order, or handing her one item at a time. Using simple, clear instructions can also help.
Remember that your mother isn’t doing this on purpose to be difficult. It’s a symptom of how dementia is affecting her brain. With compassion and some creative problem-solving, you can help guide her through daily tasks more smoothly.
