Dementia can cause strange behaviors that may seem puzzling or even amusing to others. If your mother with dementia is trying to feed a lamp, there’s likely a logical explanation rooted in how the disease affects her brain.
As dementia progresses, it becomes harder for people to interpret what they see correctly. Your mom may be mistaking the lamp for something else entirely, like a person or pet that needs care. The lamp’s shape or placement might remind her of a living thing she feels responsible for feeding.
Memory loss and confusion are hallmarks of dementia. Your mother may have a jumbled recollection of needing to feed someone or something, but can’t quite remember the details. In her mind, the lamp has become the recipient of that caregiving impulse.
Dementia can also disrupt a person’s sense of time. Your mom might think it’s mealtime when it’s not, prompting her desire to feed something nearby – in this case, the lamp.
Sometimes dementia causes people to “live” in the past. If your mother was a caregiver earlier in life, she may be reliving those experiences and projecting them onto objects around her.
It’s important to remember that while this behavior seems illogical to you, it makes perfect sense to your mother in that moment. Trying to convince her she’s wrong will likely only cause frustration and distress.
Instead, validate her feelings and gently redirect her attention. You might say something like, “I see you want to take care of the lamp. That’s so kind of you. Why don’t we go check if the cat needs feeding instead?”
Creating a calm, structured environment can help reduce confusion. Keep her surroundings familiar and minimize changes. Establish regular routines for meals and activities.
If the behavior becomes disruptive or dangerous, consult her doctor. They may recommend adjustments to her care plan or medications.
Remember, your mother isn’t doing this on purpose. Her brain is struggling to make sense of the world around her. Approach the situation with patience, compassion, and a willingness to enter her reality, even if it doesn’t match your own.
