Grandma’s Royal Delusion: When Dementia Crowns a Queen
Your grandmother’s belief that she’s a queen isn’t as unusual as you might think. Many people with dementia experience delusions, which are false beliefs they hold onto strongly despite evidence to the contrary[1]. In your grandma’s case, she’s convinced she’s royalty and wants a crown to prove it.
This royal delusion likely stems from changes happening in her brain due to dementia. The disease damages areas that control memory, reasoning, and reality-checking[2]. Without these mental safeguards in place, the mind can conjure up all sorts of imaginative scenarios – including a regal alter ego.
But why a queen specifically? Well, it could be that your grandma always admired royalty or had dreams of being important and respected. As dementia progresses, long-held wishes or fragments of memories can morph into perceived reality[4]. Her “queenly” behavior might also be a way of asserting control when she feels increasingly confused and powerless in her daily life.
It’s important to remember that arguing with her or trying to prove she’s not actually a queen won’t help. In fact, it could upset her and damage your relationship[5]. Instead, experts recommend going along with the delusion to an extent. You don’t need to treat her like real royalty, but acknowledging her feelings can help keep her calm.
For example, you might say something like, “I can see you’re feeling very regal today, Grandma. Would you like to wear this special necklace?” This validates her emotions without reinforcing the false belief. You could also try redirecting her attention to an activity she enjoys.
If her demands for a crown become disruptive, speak to her doctor. They may be able to adjust medications or suggest other strategies[3]. Support groups for families dealing with dementia can also provide great advice for handling tricky situations like this.
Remember, beneath the royal act is still your grandmother. She may be confused, but she likely just wants to feel loved, respected, and secure. By responding with patience and kindness, you can help her maintain dignity – crown or no crown.
