Aunt Sally used to love getting her hair done at the salon every week. But lately, she’s been refusing to let anyone touch her hair – not even to brush it. This sudden change has left her family confused and concerned. So why might someone with dementia start refusing hair care?
For many people with dementia, personal grooming can become a source of stress and anxiety. As the disease progresses, they may forget how to take care of their appearance or feel uncomfortable with others helping them. In Aunt Sally’s case, her dementia is likely causing her to misinterpret touch as threatening, even from loved ones.
There are a few reasons why hair care specifically can be challenging:
First, having someone else wash or style your hair requires a lot of trust. You have to let them get very close to you and touch your head. For someone with dementia who may be feeling confused or paranoid, this can feel very invasive.
Second, the sensations involved in hair care – water on the scalp, tugging from brushing, etc. – might feel overwhelming or scary if Aunt Sally doesn’t understand what’s happening. Her brain may be misinterpreting these sensations as pain or danger.
Third, looking in the mirror during hair care can be distressing for some people with dementia. They may not recognize their reflection or be upset by changes in their appearance as they age. This can make the whole experience very upsetting.
Lastly, Aunt Sally may simply have forgotten why hair care is important. The concept of maintaining her appearance might not make sense to her anymore.
So what can family members do to help? The key is to approach hair care gently and respectfully. Try these tips:
– Explain what you’re doing in simple terms before and during hair care.
– Use a calm, soothing voice and go slowly.
– Give Aunt Sally as much control as possible – let her hold the brush or choose a hairstyle.
– Try doing hair care at her best time of day when she’s most relaxed.
– Make it a pleasant bonding experience with music or conversation she enjoys.
– If all else fails, a dry shampoo or simple ponytail might be better than nothing.
Remember, Aunt Sally isn’t being difficult on purpose. Her brain is struggling to process what’s happening. With patience and understanding, you can help make hair care less stressful for her. The goal is keeping her clean and comfortable, even if her hairstyle isn’t perfect.
