Why is my aunt with dementia hiding pencils under her pillow?

Aunt Martha’s Pencil Puzzle: Understanding Dementia Behaviors

Have you noticed your aunt with dementia tucking pencils under her pillow? Don’t worry, you’re not alone in this peculiar situation. Many families caring for loved ones with dementia encounter similar behaviors that might seem odd or confusing at first glance.

Why is this happening? Well, there are a few reasons why your aunt might be hiding pencils:

1. Feeling of security: For your aunt, those pencils might represent something familiar and comforting. In a world that’s becoming increasingly confusing due to dementia, having these objects close by can provide a sense of control and safety[1].

2. Forgetfulness: Your aunt might simply be forgetting where she usually keeps her pencils. Placing them under her pillow could be her way of ensuring she knows where to find them later[1].

3. Protecting possessions: As dementia progresses, people often become worried about losing their belongings. Your aunt might be hiding the pencils to keep them “safe” from imagined theft[1].

4. Reverting to past behaviors: Sometimes, dementia can cause people to act out behaviors from their past. Perhaps your aunt used to keep important items close to her bed when she was younger[1].

5. Coping mechanism: Hiding objects can be a way for people with dementia to feel more in control of their environment, which might seem increasingly unfamiliar to them[5].

It’s important to remember that your aunt isn’t doing this to be difficult or sneaky. These behaviors are common in dementia and are often a response to confusion, fear, or a need for security[10].

So, what can you do? Here are a few tips:

1. Stay calm and patient. Remember, this behavior isn’t intentional.

2. Ensure your aunt has a designated place for her pencils that’s easy to see and access.

3. If the hiding becomes problematic, gently redirect her attention when you notice it happening.

4. Consider providing her with a small box or container where she can keep her special items, including the pencils.

5. Always approach the situation with empathy and understanding.

Remember, your aunt’s dementia journey is unique, and it might take some time to figure out the best ways to support her. If you’re ever unsure or concerned, don’t hesitate to reach out to her healthcare provider for guidance.

Caring for someone with dementia can be challenging, but with patience and love, you can help your aunt feel safe and comfortable, even if that means finding a few pencils under her pillow now and then.