why does my dad keep asking for people who aren’t alive

**Understanding Why Your Dad Keeps Asking for People Who Aren’t Alive**

If your dad keeps asking for people who aren’t alive, it can be very confusing and upsetting. This behavior is often seen in people with dementia, a condition that affects memory and thinking. Here’s what you need to know:

### Why Does This Happen?

People with dementia may forget important events or people in their lives. Sometimes, they might ask for someone who has passed away because they genuinely believe that person is still alive. This can happen because their brain is struggling to remember and process information correctly.

### How to Respond

When your dad asks for someone who isn’t alive, it’s essential to handle the situation with care and sensitivity. Here are some tips:

1. **Avoid Reminding Them of the Death**: Reminding your dad of a loved one’s death can be very painful. Instead, try to focus on the present moment and avoid bringing up past losses.

2. **Encourage Conversation**: Sometimes, talking about the person they are asking about can be comforting. You can ask your dad questions about the person, like what they liked or what memories they shared.

3. **Use Distraction Techniques**: If your dad keeps asking about someone who has passed away, you can try distracting them with something else. However, avoid completely avoiding the question, as this can make them feel more anxious.

4. **Show Empathy**: Let your dad know that you understand he might be feeling confused or upset. Sometimes, people with dementia have unmet needs, such as wanting comfort or reassurance.

5. **Focus on the Present**: Instead of asking your dad about his day, talk about your own day and give him time to ask questions. This can help shift the focus to the present and make conversations more enjoyable.

6. **Be Patient and Consistent**: Greeting your dad with a warm hello and saying your name and relationship to him each time can help him feel more secure and recognized.

### Why It’s Important to Understand

Understanding why your dad is asking for people who aren’t alive can help you respond in a way that is supportive and comforting. It’s not about trying to change his behavior but about being there for him and making him feel loved and understood.

If you’re unsure about how to handle this situation or if you notice other changes in your dad’s behavior, it might be helpful to consult with a healthcare professional who can provide guidance and support.

By being patient, empathetic, and understanding, you can make a big difference in your dad’s life and help him feel more at peace.