Dementia is a broad term describing a decline in cognitive function severe enough to interfere with daily life, including memory, thinking, and reasoning. One of the most distressing symptoms for families is when a person with dementia begins to forget significant aspects of their life, including their marriage. The question of whether dementia can make people forget their marriage is complex but grounded in how dementia affects memory and recognition.
Dementia, including Alzheimer’s disease—the most common form—primarily affects memory by damaging brain areas responsible for storing and retrieving memories. Early on, short-term memory is often impaired, but as the disease progresses, long-term memories, including those of family members and life events, can also be lost. This means that a person with dementia may gradually forget their spouse, the fact that they are married, or details about their relationship[3][5].
Medical research shows that the brain structures involved in memory, such as the hippocampus and related cortical areas, deteriorate in dementia. This degradation disrupts the ability to recall personal history and recognize familiar faces, including those of loved ones. A study from the University of Virginia highlights how Alzheimer’s disease leads to the breakdown of these brain regions, explaining why patients may forget loved ones over time[5].
However, the experience of forgetting a spouse is not uniform. Some people with dementia retain recognition of their spouse and the emotional connection for a long time, even if they cannot recall specific details. For example, Jay Leno, whose wife Mavis has dementia, shared that although she experiences confusion and relives traumatic memories repeatedly, she has not forgotten him and still expresses love and comfort in his presence[2]. This suggests that emotional memory and recognition can sometimes persist despite cognitive decline.
Caregivers play a crucial role in supporting people with dementia, helping them maintain connections to their identity and relationships. Innovative approaches, such as reminiscence therapy and AI-powered storytelling tools, are being developed to help rekindle memories by sharing life stories and meaningful experiences. These therapies can sometimes help people with dementia reconnect with their sense of self and their relationships, including their marriage[1].
It is important to understand that dementia affects each person differently. Some may forget their marriage entirely, while others may retain emotional bonds even if factual memory fades. The progression of memory loss depends on the type of dementia, its severity, and individual brain changes.
In summary, dementia can cause people to forget their marriage because it impairs memory and recognition of familiar people and events. This is due to the deterioration of brain areas responsible for memory storage and retrieval. However, emotional connections and recognition may persist longer than factual memory, and supportive therapies can help maintain these bonds.
Sources:
[1] George Mason College of Public Health research on dementia caregiving and reminiscence therapy
[2] Jay Leno’s account of his wife’s dementia experience, TODAY show, 2025
[3] Nuvance Health on memory loss and dementia symptoms
[5] University of Virginia research on Alzheimer’s disease and memory degradation
