Can Dementia Make People Forget Family Members Temporarily
Dementia is a condition that affects millions of people worldwide, and one of its most challenging aspects is how it impacts memory and the ability to recognize loved ones. Many families face the heartbreaking question: can dementia cause someone to temporarily forget family members? The answer is yes, and understanding how this happens can help families navigate this difficult situation with more compassion and practical strategies.
What Happens to Memory in Dementia
When someone has dementia, their brain undergoes changes that affect how memories are stored and retrieved. The condition damages brain cells in ways that make it difficult to encode new information or access existing memories. Short-term memory loss is often the very first sign of Alzheimer’s disease, which is the most common type of dementia. [5] This means that recent events, conversations, and even faces of people they have recently met may not stick in their mind the way they used to.
The cognitive symptoms of dementia relate to the area of the brain affected. Typically this includes memory plus one other cognitive region. The most commonly affected areas of brain function include memory, language, attention, problem solving, and visuospatial function affecting perception and orientation. [4] This means that someone with dementia might struggle not just with remembering who someone is, but also with understanding what they are saying or recognizing their face.
How Dementia Affects Recognition of Family Members
One of the most painful aspects of dementia is that it can cause people to forget the names of family members or friends, or mix up family members. [5] This can happen temporarily or become more persistent as the disease progresses. Someone might forget the name of a close family member or friend, or they might confuse one person with another. [4]
The type of memory loss varies from person to person. Alzheimer’s disease and other types of memory loss do not affect each person similarly. Some will retain long-term memories and may recognize the faces of their loved ones who live afar, while perhaps they don’t recognize the faces of the most recent grandchildren. [1] This means that a parent with dementia might remember their adult child who moved away years ago but struggle to recognize a grandchild they see regularly.
The Temporary Nature of Memory Loss
It is important to understand that memory loss in dementia can fluctuate. Most people with memory loss experience significant fluctuations in daily recall abilities. [1] This means that on some days, a person with dementia might recognize a family member perfectly well, while on other days they might not remember who that person is. These fluctuations can be confusing and emotionally draining for both the person with dementia and their family members.
The temporary nature of this forgetting is particularly challenging because it creates false hope. A family member might think that their loved one is getting better because they recognized them one day, only to find that the next day brings no recognition. Understanding that these fluctuations are normal can help families prepare emotionally for what to expect.
Why Temporary Forgetting Happens
The reason people with dementia temporarily forget family members has to do with how their brain processes and stores information. When someone has dementia, their brain struggles to encode or consolidate new information. [2] This is especially true for short-term memory. Even if someone has known a family member their entire life, if they have not seen that person recently, the memory might not be easily accessible in the moment.
Additionally, dementia can cause someone to “time-shift” to a time when certain people were more present in their life. [2] For example, someone might forget that their adult child moved away and think they should be at home. Or they might forget that a grandchild was born and not recognize them as a family member.
The Role of Long-Term Memory
As dementia progresses, it affects different areas of the brain and damages different abilities. Short-term memory is often affected first, but later, long-term memory is also affected. [5] This means that in the early stages of dementia, someone might remember their children but forget recent conversations. As the disease progresses, they might forget their children’s names or even fail to recognize them.
However, the progression is not always straightforward. Some people retain long-term memories better than others, which is why the experience of dementia is unique for each person. [5]
Preparing for Family Gatherings
When a family member with dementia will be attending a gathering or when family members will be visiting, preparation can make a significant difference. You may be able to assist them in recalling who will be at the reunion by helping them study ahead of time. Consider gathering photographs of each person at the event and writing their names on the photo. [1]
Before a family gathering, spend a few minutes daily talking with your loved one about who each person is, and show them photographs. Simply sharing their names is a start, but dig deeper into who they are. If your sister’s son is a carpenter and so was your dad before retiring, he is much more likely to remember because he has deeper connections to the individual. [1] Making these connections helps the brain create stronger pathways to the memory.
Communicating with Family Members
If your family does not gather or visit regularly, they may have no idea that your parent has memory loss. It can be heartbreaking and confusing when the senior does not recall who the visitor is, so be sure that everyone is aware of their condition. [1] This communication is crucial because it helps family members understand what is happening and respond with patience rather than hurt feelings.
When family members understand that the forgetting is due to a medical condition and not a reflection of how much the person with dementia cares about them, they can approach interactions with more compassion. Simply showing your face, having a conversation and participating in activities together can do wonders for dementia and Alzheimer’s sufferers. [8]
Managing Behavior During Interactions
Memory loss is not the only side effect of dementia and Alzheimer’s disease. People with these conditions often become confused and agitated because they cannot remember things or when people get very close to them physically. [1] When a family member does not recognize someone, they might become anxious or defensive. Understanding this can help family members respond appropriately.
If your loved one becomes confused or agitated during a family visit, keep an eye on them in case you need to provide calming words or help the individual step away from the chaos for a while to relax. [1] Sometimes a quiet room and a few minutes alone can help someone with dementia regain their composure.
The Emotional Impact of Temporary Forgetting
For family members, the temporary forgetting of their identity by a loved one with dementia can be deeply painful. However, it is important to remember that this forgetting is not personal. The person with dementia is not choosing to forget. Their brain is simply not able to access or process the memory in that moment.
Understanding that
