She keeps asking where her husband is, even though he died years ago. This situation often happens with people who have dementia, a condition that affects memory and thinking. When someone has dementia, their brain struggles to hold onto recent memories, and sometimes they forget important facts like the death of a loved one. Instead, they may believe the person is still alive and ask about them repeatedly.
This behavior is not about being stubborn or trying to upset others. It comes from the way dementia changes the brain. The person may genuinely feel confused and anxious because they cannot remember what happened or understand why their husband is not there. They might even create explanations in their mind, like thinking he is away or missing, to make sense of the absence.
For family and friends, this can be very hard to handle. Hearing the same question over and over can be painful, especially when it reminds them of their loss. But it’s important to respond with patience and kindness. Telling the person firmly that their husband died may not help and can sometimes cause more distress, as they might hear it like it’s the first time and feel the grief all over again.
Instead, caregivers can try to comfort the person by acknowledging their feelings and offering reassurance. Talking gently about the husband, sharing memories, or simply being present can help the person feel safe and supported. It’s also important for caregivers to take care of their own feelings during this difficult time.
This kind of repeated questioning is common in dementia and reflects the deep challenges the brain faces in processing loss and change. It shows how memory loss can affect not just facts but emotions and understanding of reality. Supporting someone through this requires compassion, patience, and sometimes professional help to manage the emotional and practical difficulties that come with dementia.
