Why is my father with dementia forgetting how to use a spoon?

Dementia can make everyday tasks challenging, even ones as simple as using a spoon. When your father forgets how to use a spoon, it’s because dementia is affecting the parts of his brain that control memory and motor skills[1][3].

As dementia progresses, it damages more brain cells, making it harder to remember how to do familiar activities[9]. Your father’s brain may no longer automatically connect the action of picking up a spoon with the task of eating. It’s like the instructions for using utensils have become jumbled or gone missing in his mind.

This forgetfulness isn’t just about memory – it also involves problems with coordination and recognizing objects[11]. Your father might look at the spoon and not understand what it’s for or how to hold it properly. His hands may not cooperate when he tries to scoop food, even if he wants to eat.

It’s important to remember that this isn’t your father’s fault. He’s not being difficult on purpose. His brain is changing, making once-easy tasks confusing and frustrating[3].

To help, you can gently guide his hand or demonstrate how to use the spoon. Using simpler utensils or finger foods might also make eating easier for him[9]. The key is to be patient and supportive as he navigates these challenges.

While it’s tough to watch a loved one struggle with basic tasks, understanding why it’s happening can help you respond with compassion. Your father needs your love and support now more than ever as he copes with the effects of dementia on his daily life.