Why Grandparents With Dementia Forget Grandkids (And How to Cope)

**Why Grandparents With Dementia Forget Grandkids (And How to Cope)**

Living with a grandparent who has dementia can be challenging, especially when they start to forget their grandkids. It’s natural to feel worried and confused about what’s happening. But understanding the reasons behind this forgetfulness and knowing how to cope can make a big difference.

### Why Do Grandparents With Dementia Forget Their Grandkids?

Dementia is a condition that affects the brain, causing memory loss and confusion. As the disease progresses, people with dementia may forget important things, including their family members. This forgetfulness is not because they don’t love their grandkids; it’s just that their brains are struggling to hold onto memories.

### How to Explain Dementia to Grandkids

When your grandkids ask why Grandma or Grandpa forgets them, it’s essential to explain it in a way they can understand. You can tell them that Grandma or Grandpa has a disease that affects their brain, making it hard for them to remember things. A simple analogy is to say that their mind is like a bucket with a hole in it, and memories are slowly leaking out.

For younger children, this explanation is enough. For older kids, you might need to provide more details about what dementia is and how it affects people. It’s okay to say that you don’t know everything, but you can always look it up together or ask the doctor for more information.

### How to Keep Grandkids Involved

Even though Grandma or Grandpa might forget them sometimes, it’s crucial to keep the grandkids involved in their lives. Here are some ways to do this:

1. **Involve Older Kids in Daily Care**: Older kids can help with simple tasks like making lunch, helping Grandma keep her personal items organized, or checking the mailbox. This not only helps Grandma but also makes the kids feel more connected and involved.

2. **Plan Activities Together**: Activities like planting a garden, going for nature walks, or having picnics can be great ways to spend time together. These activities can help lower anxiety levels and create positive memories.

3. **Supervise Visits**: Always supervise visits between the grandkids and their grandparents with dementia. This ensures everyone’s safety and helps prevent any misunderstandings or meltdowns.

4. **Encourage Visits**: Even though Grandma or Grandpa might forget them sometimes, visiting them regularly can still bring joy and positive feelings to both parties. Explain to the kids how beneficial these visits are and how much they help.

5. **Consider Counseling**: If the grandkids are struggling to cope with the changes, consider taking them to a counselor or family therapist. This can provide a safe space for them to express their feelings and work through any challenges they’re facing.

### How to Take Care of Yourself

Caring for a grandparent with dementia can be emotionally draining. It’s essential to take care of yourself too. Here are some tips:

1. **Allow Yourself to Cry**: It’s okay to cry and express your emotions. This helps release chemicals that can make you feel better.

2. **Keep a Journal**: Writing down your feelings in a journal can be therapeutic and help you process everything.

3. **Talk to Someone**: If you have a trusted friend or family member, talk to them about your feelings. You can also join online carers’ forums or groups for support.

4. **Do Things That Make You Happy**: Find small moments of joy, like listening to your favorite music or doing a crossword puzzle. These small pleasures can make a big difference.

5. **Practice Mindfulness**: Mindfulness involves being aware of your thoughts, feelings, and sensations in the present moment. This can help reduce stress and improve your overall well-being.

By understanding why grandparents with dementia forget their grandkids and by taking steps to involve the kids and take care of yourself, you can navigate this challenging situation more effectively. Remember, it