What should you do if a person with dementia is fixated on a deceased loved one

When someone with dementia becomes fixated on a deceased loved one, it can be challenging and emotional for caregivers and family members. This fixation often stems from the way dementia affects memory, time perception, and emotional processing.

People with dementia frequently lose their sense of time and may confuse past events with the present. They might believe that a loved one who has passed away is still alive or expect them to return soon because their brain struggles to understand the passage of time accurately[1]. This can lead to repeated questions about the person or persistent talking about them.

Here are some practical steps you can take if a person with dementia is fixated on someone who has died:

– **Respond with empathy, not correction**: Trying to repeatedly remind them that the person has passed away may cause distress or confusion. Instead, acknowledge their feelings by listening patiently and validating their emotions without insisting on facts.

– **Use distraction gently**: Redirecting their attention to another activity or topic they enjoy can help ease anxiety related to fixation. For example, engaging in music therapy, looking at photo albums together (focusing on happy memories), or doing simple crafts might provide comfort.

– **Create comforting routines**: People with dementia often find security in familiar routines. Maintaining consistent daily schedules helps reduce anxiety that might fuel obsessive thoughts about lost loved ones[2].

– **Provide reassurance through presence**: Sometimes just being there physically—holding hands or sitting quietly—can soothe feelings of loneliness tied to grief.

– **Seek professional support if needed**: If fixation leads to significant distress for either the person living with dementia or caregivers, consulting healthcare professionals experienced in dementia care can offer strategies tailored for individual needs[5].

Understanding that this behavior is part of how dementia alters perception helps caregivers respond more compassionately rather than becoming frustrated. The goal is not necessarily correcting reality but easing emotional pain while ensuring safety and dignity for your loved one.

In summary, when a person with dementia fixates on someone who has died:

– Recognize it as part of altered memory and time perception.
– Respond kindly without confrontation.
– Use distraction and comforting activities.
– Maintain reassuring routines.
– Seek professional advice when necessary.

This approach supports both emotional well-being for your loved one and peace of mind for those caring for them[1][2][5].