### Preparing Power of Attorney Documents Early in the Onset of Memory Loss
When an elderly parent is diagnosed with memory loss, it can be a challenging time for the entire family. One of the most important steps to take during this period is to prepare power of attorney documents. These documents ensure that your parent’s wishes are respected and that someone they trust can make decisions on their behalf.
#### Why Prepare Power of Attorney Documents Early?
Preparing power of attorney documents early in the onset of memory loss is crucial for several reasons:
1. **Respecting Wishes**: It ensures that your parent’s wishes are carried out, even when they can no longer make decisions themselves. This includes where they want to live, who they want to care for them, and how they want their money to be used for care.
2. **Avoiding Conflicts**: When siblings share power of attorney, early preparation helps avoid conflicts over decision-making. It’s easier to document and agree on what your parent wants before memory loss increases.
3. **Protecting Against Abuse**: Having clear, documented wishes and a trusted agent can protect your parent from potential abuse. This includes isolating them from others who might take advantage of their situation.
4. **Financial Planning**: Early diagnosis allows for financial planning, including Medicaid planning if necessary. This ensures that your parent’s financial resources are used effectively for their care.
#### How to Prepare Power of Attorney Documents
Preparing power of attorney documents involves several steps:
1. **Document Parent’s Wishes**: Have open and honest conversations with your parent about their wishes. Discuss where they want to live, who they want to care for them, and how they want their money to be used for care.
2. **Record Conversations**: Videotape these conversations with your parent and any other relevant family members. This documentation helps avoid disputes later on.
3. **Medical Diagnosis**: Ensure that your parent is certified by two physicians in writing to be incapacitated. This certification is often required by power of attorney documents.
4. **Regular Check-Ups**: Schedule regular check-ups with the doctor to monitor the progression of memory loss. This helps in planning and making informed decisions.
5. **Protective Clauses**: Include protective clauses in the power of attorney document that specify who can change the document and under what circumstances. For example, you might include a clause that requires the attorney who created the documents and two specific individuals to be contacted before any changes are made.
6. **List Physicians**: List all physicians in the document and provide a current history and physical (H&P) along with a list of diagnoses. This establishes a baseline of health when the power of attorney document is created.
#### Warning Signs of Potential Abuse
While preparing power of attorney documents is crucial, it’s also important to watch out for warning signs of potential abuse:
1. **Isolation**: If your parent is being isolated from others, it could be a sign of abuse. Abusive caregivers might threaten your parent that if they tell anyone what is going on, the caregiver will physically harm them or leave the caregiving relationship.
2. **Emotional Pressure**: Abusive caregivers often place a lot of emotional pressure on loved ones. They might tell your parent that if they leave, no one will care for them.
3. **Conflict Among Siblings**: If one sibling wants total control over your parent and the other sibling gives in, it can lead to problems. The sibling who didn’t want to be involved might later become concerned about the decisions being made.
#### Conclusion
Preparing power of attorney documents early in the onset of memory loss is essential for ensuring that your parent’s wishes are respected and that they are protected from potential abuse. By documenting their wishes, including protective clauses, and monitoring the progression of memory loss, you can create a safe and secure environment for your elderly parent. If you have concerns about potential abuse, speak up and seek help immediately.
